Wednesday, July 06, 2005

A Change of Blog Plans

It's funny how life gets in the way of our plans sometimes. I was going to load Palm Pilot software on my laptop tonight, so that I could post a long blog post that I wrote in my Palm Pilot the last day of the Model Schools Conference in Nashville, a week ago. Much of it concerned my continued unhappiness with my job situation, probably very whiny and pathetic in tone. For those three people who read my blog, most of it redundant. I'm sure I will at some point post some of it--the next time I'm feeling sorry for myself and need to wallow in my unhappiness maybe.

For now though, I have to talk about my niece being one of the employees in this jewelry store robbery, Store Employees Bound During Jewelry Store Robbery. When my younger sister called me this afternoon and told me about it, I was calm and seemingly unaffected emotionally. I told Valerie about it, and my voice didn't even crack or anything. My sister had immediately told me that my niece was okay, but that she had been tied up and held at gunpoint during the robbery. Later, I spoke to my sister again, and I was still not really upset about the situation. I was concerned about my niece, of course, but I didn't feel like crying or anything. I didn't even try to call my brother (her father). I just felt like it was over, and I shouldn't make a big deal about it, but, of course, it's a very traumatic thing for my niece to have gone through.

Then about 30 minutes ago, I searched the web for the media outlets in that part of East Texas and found the news story. I decided to email the story to some of my prayerful friends and ask for prayers for my niece. As I was typing the email, tears filled my eyes and washed down my cheeks. Suddenly, I was overcome with relief that she was not hurt physically and shame that I had not called her or my brother. What is wrong with me? I am a horrible sister and aunt these days. Why didn't I call? Selfishness? Fear of crying? Silliness? Probably a combination of all three to be honest. I am selfish, extremely so these days. I do think I might cry if/when I talk to either my niece or my brother, but I'm not sure why I feel that I will cry. I am silly about family situations, especially when it involves illness or hurt. Unfortunately, it's too late to do anything about it tonight. I will call them both tomorrow morning.

Speaking of tomorrow, I have to go to work again tomorrow. I really hate working during my summer vacation, but usually I can feel okay about if I'm getting paid for the work. This summer, however, even getting paid hasn't made me feel okay about working. Today was the first day of two days of curriculum writing for our new advisory period, and it could have been a disaster. Luckily, though, I was able to work with Valerie and Lucy. If I had had to work with either of two particularly irritating co-workers, the Psycho sounds that I heard every time PICW1 spoke today might have manifested themselves into Psycho actions. PICW1 gets on my last nerve. Warning! Tackiness is forthcoming--stop reading if you don't want to witness my cattiness. ICW1 has absolutely no taste in clothes, but she thinks she is so cute--a prime candidate for What Not to Wear. (If I didn't dislike her so much, I might have to try to get her on that show.) The too short pleated black skirt today almost caused audible guffaws, but I found enough will power to restrain myself. I don't know if I have any left for tomorrow's outfit though.

Now I have to go to bed and go to sleep. I hope I don't have nightmares about armed robbers, Psycho, or, even worse, ICW1 and her bad outfits. ;-) Later.

1 comment:

Peace Be, Clint-Michael ... said...

Who is ICW or Psycho??? Dying to know...